Come this fall, there will be plenty of beer and football inside the new Levi’s Stadium, but don’t expect to tap your own keg, toss a football, play a bugle, spill any substance, or bring your pet Gila monster to any San Francisco 49ers games or Super Bowl L.
New preliminary regulations set for approval at tonight’s Santa Clara City Council meeting offer a long list of taboo items and behavior, in what is a preliminary draft for public debate prior to the official adoption of the ordinance before the “Field of Jeans'” first event August 2nd.
The document lists in typical legalese about eight pages of unapproved items and actions.
Among them are the following rules slated for adoption:
- No throwing, launching, or “spilling” of any solid object would be permitted. The ordinance would specifically denote “no footballs, beach balls, and Frisbees,” but the real Draconian policy might be that police could toss you out of the stadium parking lot or the stadium proper for “…causing a substance to be thrown, discharged, launched, spilled, or to become airborn[e].” That includes both solid and liquid objects, so don’t spill your beer, or your nachos.
- No guns, not even for off-duty officers. No knives either, but it doesn’t specify whether that’s like the TSA’s “no knives” or a more reasonable “no dangerous knives.”
- No explosions. Fireworks, stink bombs, etc. Makes sense, right?
- Don’t go beyond the area open to the public. No brainer there.
- No bringing cans, bottles, flasks, etc., of alcohol in without authorization. (Parking lots should be okay though).
- No trying to get in without a ticket.
- “No person shall behave in so disruptive, unsafe, noisy, boisterous or profane manner as to disturb spectators or participants at any stadium event so that assigned personnel must address the person to cease or prevent a recurrence of the disruptive, unsafe, noisy, boisterous or profane behavior.” Meaning don’t do anything that makes the ushers come over and have to talk with you, otherwise they can toss you out.
- “No person shall urinate or defecate except in a designated lavatory facility.” Good one!
- “No person shall violate any local ordinance or state law.” That’s the nice, broad, “cover your butt” rule.
- If they eject you, you have to go, and not try to re-enter, even by buying another ticket.
- Inside the stadium, there are no bugles. Also no air horns, “powered” megaphones (so those cheerleader cone things might be okay), no drums, no musical instruments. In the parking lot, bring your banjo if you want.
- No bringing your goldfish to the game or even the parking lot. Also, you can’t bring or even try to lure an animal including bird, fish, reptile, into the parking lot or stadium unless it’s a service dog.
- Everyone has to obey the “lawful order of law enforcement officers or Stadium security personnel.”
- No smoking outside of designated areas (unless you’re a 49er, a rock star, an employee, or someone else who is getting paid to be there).
- No taking someone else’s seat without a valid ticket.
- No blocking aisles.
- In the parking lot, there is no driver training allowed, plus no “volleyball, baseball, soccer, football, roller skating, bicycle riding, or skateboarding within the parking areas unless expressly authorized by the Authorized Representative.”
- Also in the parking lot, “No tables, barbecues, chairs, umbrellas or other objects shall be permitted on walkways, driveways, landscaped areas, vehicle access lanes and promenades in the parking areas without the permission of the Authorized Representative. Tailgating is only allowed in specific permitted parking lots.”
- You’ve got to pay for parking.
- Don’t take more than one space.
- Don’t use other parking spaces for seating, tailgating, etc. Keep it behind your car, basically.
- This one could help prevent fights between rival teams’ fans: “No person shall interfere in any manner with the use of an adjacent parking space.”
- You’ve got to keep your radio or banjo at a reasonable volume. Nothing can be heard from over 50 feet away.
- No selling food, drink, or services in the parking lot or the perimeter sidewalk.
- In the parking lot, no kegs, or any type of glass unless it’s for prescription medicine.
Violating these could land you a first-time fine of $100, or up to 6 months in jail or fines of up to $1,000 depending on how bad it is.
This is just a starting point though, and the public has plenty of time to review these policies before they become an official Santa Clara ordinance.